Month: July 2015

Weekly Illumination – July 26th, 2015


Sunday – Six of Cups


The karmic partner that you connected with last week will take on much more significance to you this week as you both explore the emotional potential that you both have. Your connection together is something that perfectly helps the both of you tap into your inner children. This soul mate love can be between a lover of yours or even a friend or a sibling or parent. Labels dissolve as the soul connection strengthens.

Monday – Two of Pentacles

 two pents

This is going to be a very productive day that will keep you busy from beginning to end so be prepared to work hard. The energy you generate today will set the momentum for the rest of the week. Follow the instinctual cues that your body gives you as you surely will be on a roll the more you keep up with the pace of events.

Tuesday – The Star

 the star

A chance encounter with an actual superstar for some of you will inspire you in the greatest of ways. For others this is going to be a great day to restore optimism in the Universe as you see things in your life fall into place the way you know they are meant to. In fact for all reading this there will be a much greater connection to the cosmos in relation to the great shifts we will all be experiencing. This day will be one of those days you remember for the rest of your life.

Wednesday – Ten of Cups

 ten cups

Love, happiness, and bliss will bless your consciousness so that you can gain a much higher perspective of what peace really is and why it is meant to be spread all around the world. You will learn that it isn’t your unrealistic dreams and expectations that bring happiness into your life but rather your appreciation for what you have and experience now in the moment. Relish in all this positive energy that you have the opportunity to experience and if it is not around you then create it from the wisdom and power of your heart.

Thursday – Six of Pentacles

six of pentacles

 The lesson you learn today will be very valuable as you will gain insight on the best ways to balance what you have with what someone else has. What you learn in a seemingly casual way will teach you how to know when you are giving too much and when you are letting others take advantage of what you have while also learning how to receive and accept things from other people. On a side note, you may get certain things you have wished for on this day but just be sure you really want it because you will surely get it.

Friday – Two of Pentacles

two of pentacles 2

The productivity you have been generating all week will come back full circle today and add to the momentum in a way that gives you greater control over what you are doing. You will find yourself playing with even more material energy than you did before so that you can manifest even greater things in your life.

Saturday – King of Pentacles king of pentacles

Your capacity to experience greater wealth on this day will be manifested and if you were looking for a big break financially this will be the day. This breakthrough is not like winning the lottery or receiving a large sum of money but rather paving the way for a much greater class of wealth in your life that adds to the value you place on yourself and the work you do.

Weekly Summary

The work that you do on this week will literally set you up for more wealth than you may be used to. Even if you are used to it and it doesn’t seem as much at first, this will open you up to a greater degree of value than you usually gain. Such great developments in your material reality will add to the emotional bliss and happiness that you will experience and one of your greatest goals you had planned to achieve will come to fruition this week which will motivate you to work even harder. Be grateful to the Universe and more importantly thank yourself for not giving up even when it felt impossible to move on!

If you would like to schedule a reading, you can contact me at: OR
Song of the Week —-> Pôr do Sol peace Brought to you by -The Peace Dealer-

Weekly Illumination – July 19th, 2015


Sunday – Three of Cups

  three of cups

A special connection will be made with people you have a strong soul bond with. If you have been looking to connect with friends who understand you at a deep level then this is the day you can celebrate your mutual success with such people. Allow any trust issues to fade away as you form new connections or improve on existing ones.

Monday – Eight of Swords

 8 swords 2

The pressure of all your shortcomings will cloud your thought process. Do not allow these illusions to blind you to the true reality of your life. These negative thoughts may be coming from the negative intent of other people over your life so just shrug off any negativity and stay positive.

Tuesday – Knight of Pentacles

 knight of pentacles

Your financial progress will be on your mind today and the actions you take towards securing more material success will definitely work out well for you. Think long term and make sure that you don’t rush what you do in an effort to get rich quick. Take a more realistic approach that may have you work harder but at the end of the day promises success in your endeavors.

Wednesday – Five of Pentacles

5 of pents 5

Have you been in touch with your soul mate? You have a karmic partner that you may have not been able to see with clear eyes before since you were looking for a knight in shining armor or a stunning princess of exquisite beauty. The connection you restore today will be with someone who doesn’t exceptionally stand out from the average person yet is worth more any of those superficial standards in your eyes.

Thursday – Six of Swords

 six of swords

This day gives you an excellent opportunity to gain distance from deeply grained psychological issues. Also you will be able to communicate well with others in a way that helps both of you stay on the same page. You can gain valuable perspective by traveling mentally through reading books that appeal to you.

Friday – King of Pentacles

 king of p

For those of you who deal with land ownership this day will be really beneficial for you in that you may gain better deals on places you wish you buy or sell. There is a vision of wealth you have in your life that on this day you will be able to realistically gain insight on. How does someone who is wealthy think and act? These are the questions that you will answer.

Saturday – Ace of Wands

 ace of wands

A grand spark of inspiration will open up doors to your heart that rev up all your energy centers in order to give you new passion in your life. This can be an exciting opportunity that you take full advantage of or even a passionate encounter with someone you have a huge crush on! Whatever this manifests itself as, this cosmic spark will last much longer than you expect it to.


Weekly Summary

Your connections with people who see your true worth will definitely open doors for new opportunities that can potentially add to your value in really great ways. You will do best to not play the victim and focus on moving past any negativity. Your ability to stay positive throughout any setbacks will help you gain the energy you need to experience heightened passion in your life.

If you would like to schedule a reading, you can contact me at: OR

Song of the Week —-> So High (Cloud 9 Remix)peace

Brought to you by -The Peace Dealer-

Weekly Illumination – July 12th, 2015


Sunday – Ace of Cups

ace of cups

A new wave of emotions will bless your heart in ways that restore your faith in love. Normally this indicates a new love entering your life and that may be the case but what I sense is an awakening of your intuition that allows you to see past the trivial things in your life and see more into the deeper spiritual realities that affect the collective consciousness. Enjoy this gift from the heart in whatever form it arrives…it may even be a gift that comes from you. 😉

Monday –  King of Cups

king of cups web copy

Emotional composure will be called upon as you may be around people who need someone who is a great listener. Responding to everything with compassion will help you more than being insensitive to the needs of people as well as your own needs. The depth of psychic energy you feel on this day will reach a new level too which will help you feel emotions with more mastery.

Tuesday – The Sun

 sun 2

Your heart chakra will burst open and inspire you with much joy. There may not even be a reason for this activation of energies so do not really look for meaning in it. Instead share that joy with those who you care for as they will definitely feel it strongly and it will help uplift their day. The light of love from the cosmos is here to make things even brighter in your life!

Wednesday – The Emperor


You will gain great understanding of how to handle positions of authority whether this may be in the form of you learning from an authority figure or actually experiencing it yourself real time. The power that you harness will help you control your life in a much greater way however make sure you do not let all that power get to your head. Stand tall and claim your victory in a self assured and composed way.

Thursday – The Tower


 A much needed shake up will strike when you least expect it. This will instantly seem like the world is falling apart and if you cannot adapt to change then you will be set back a lot. However if you are able to perceive this sudden change in a positive way it can actually be something that greatly helps you instead. Make sure you show reality who is boss.

Friday – Two of Pentacles

 two of pentacles

This is a great day to experiment with extra ways to increase revenue as well as try out new revenue streams. Your productivity on this day you exercise will keep your mind off any negative emotions you may be feelings. The events of this day will keep you busy so make sure you keep up with the pace.

Saturday – Eight of Swords


You will be tested on whether you can handle the harsher realities of life so you can experience firsthand how you let that affect your attitude. Do not allow these temporary circumstances make you develop a negative mind state.

Weekly Summary

The very positive way of emotional joy and love that blesses you will set the tone all week and help you get through any turbulence you experience throughout the rest of these important last days. Whenever you feel like reverting to a negative way of perceiving your reality just remember that you are promised to always have the truth of love in your heart. The power you gained more control of at the beginning of the week will still be just as powerful and available for you to use.

If you would like to schedule a reading, you can contact me at: OR

Song of the Week —-> Lovin’ Itpeace

Brought to you by -The Peace Dealer-

Cosmic Conundrum Pt. 5 – Wheels of Fate

*On a remote mountaintop far away*

Virgo: *sigh*……..I used to love coming here to ease my stress…..but now I can’t even calm down here of all places….look at me talking to myself like that idiot Gemini….I don’t understand why I have to be the one doing everything….EVERYTHING!!!….little birdie please tell me everything will be okay…

*bird chirps*

Virgo: *sigh*… I’m talking to animals like that loser Pisces….little birdie tell me what it’s like to be free. I wish to fly away from all these problems…

*bird chirps*

Virgo: Please little birdie….tell me…what am I going to do. I’m so close to finding the truth about this corruption scheme but there is only so much I can do alone…

Mountain Goat: Well you should start by not letting little animals take care of your problems.

*Virgo turns around to face goat*

Virgo: ……Either this Grand Master Kush I smoked is some incredibly good shit….or I need to stop smoking….

Mountain Goat: Neither….but I do have something very important to talk to you about.

*Mountain Goat morphs into Capricorn*

Capricorn: You’ve spent your whole life trying to do what’s right….and for what? I’ve always shown you respect and you know this. I want you to work for me.

Virgo: ………Gemini told me what you were up to….she didn’t mention too much though…but at the time I didn’t want to believe you were behind this corruption…

Capricorn: To me it’s not corruption. It’s taking advantage of opportunity. What you need is to see with your own eyes what I deal with…and maybe then you can understand why I make the hard decisions I make.

Virgo: …………

Capricorn: You surround yourself with mediocrity. Gemini, Sagittarius, and even Pisces….they are all useless. I know how much they don’t value your hard work. You deserve better and you know it.

Virgo: ……….

Capricorn: The new moon will be in your sign in two days. Take that time to make up your mind. Meet me at this mountain again if you are ready….I know you will decide to join me….I just know it…

*Capricorn morphs back into a mountain goat and leaves*

Virgo: ……….

* Sagittarius rips through space time continuum*

Sagittarius: Virgo!!!! Hey we need to talk right now!

Virgo: Holy shit! I told you I hate when you surprise me like that what the hell is your problem?!!

Sagittarius: I’m so sorry I forgot I swear! I have to tell you something about Pisces….and wait…was that Capricorn that just left looking like a goat?

Virgo: Yes

Sagittarius: ……what did you guys talk about?

Virgo: ………it’s none of your business.

Sagittarius: ……oh well whatever. Look….Pisces and Libra are falling in love.

Virgo: ….and why is that important in any way?

Sagittarius: You of all people should know! Libra is so indecisive and this is going to so chaotically affect the balance of the Universe especially with the imagination of everyone being skewed by love and illusion!!!!

Virgo: ……you do realize that none of what you said makes any logical sense….right? Besides these are grown women. They can deal with that themselves.

Sagittarius: Well it makes sense to me! Come on Virgo we have to do something about this!

Virgo: ‘We’ don’t have to do anything. You seriously came all this way to tell me that??? What a waste of time….

Sagittarius: ……something’s changed with you….I mean I can understand you are angry at our lack of help but you don’t even want to help like you usually do….did Capricorn tell you anything?

Virgo: ……I said that’s none of your business. I’m leaving now. Don’t follow me either…I need more time alone.

*Virgo walks down mountain path*

Sagittarius: Damn……something’s not right….and if Virgo won’t help then I might have to tell Gemini what’s up. I know I promsied Pisces but I have no choice now. Aries is gonna kill me. I’m super late for our gym meeting…

*Meanwhile at the gym*

Aries: I figured Sagittarius would be late but damn…I’m already done with my workout! She really needs work on her flakiness I can’t deal with such unreliability.

*Taurus walks in gym*

Aries: Taurus? I didn’t know you work out here.

Taurus: Ew heavens no. I only work out on the sofa to watch Netflix. I came to find you. We need to talk.

Aries: Sure what’s up?

Taurus: I want you to help me talk to Libra. She isn’t the most honest with me but with you I know I can gain the right information from her.

Aries: Um….okay. Is there anything wrong with her?

Taurus: Clueless as usual I see. Listen….on my way back to Earth from the meeting I had with the Royal Fixed signs….I realized something grave. No one realizes it yet because they don’t have my perspective. They can’t sense nature like I can…but things are way more worse than we thought. Being that you aren’t that aware come with me. I’ll fill you in.


Weekly Illumination – July 5th, 2015


Sunday – The High Priestess


You will be moved by your soul to gain a deeper understanding of what has been going on behind the scenes. The events of your waking reality will merge with the hidden truths of your dreams to make your intuition much easier to listen to and take practical steps towards actualizing. You will know certain things to be true in your heart before they happen and your trust in your inner wisdom will help the synchronicities you experience make much more sense to you and those around you.

Monday – Knight of Pentacles


You will get a much greater sense of what the work you need to occupy yourself with is. This will be a simple routine you develop that if you stick to and stay consistent with will exceed your expectations concerning what it yield and what you reap from it. Make sure you stay attentive to the fine details so you do not miss out on important things.

Tuesday – The Chariot


The energy from the past two days will help you gain much finer control over your reality and set you up with great momentum to get through the rest of the week. In fact this will be a day where you achieve a goal that you have been working for over a long time however it may not seem like it at first. This will be something you gain greater perspective over later on but for now keep up the great work!

Wednesday – Eight of Swords

 8 of swords 4

Any minor or major setbacks or misunderstandings on your part or others will attempt to knock you off your momentum. You will do best to sit with these negative thoughts and really examine how much they are based on reality and how much are just you over thinking things. Don’t get stuck in a victim mentality.

Thursday – Knight of Swords

 knight swords

There will be a lot of unstable energy in the air that may make you impatient. You may get away with rushing things but do so with discretion. The conclusions you rush to will have power behind them so if you don’t have time to look before you leap then move forward with much conviction as you will be called to think outside the box and act in a revolutionary way.

Friday – Eight of Swords

 8 swords

The very same things you were tempted to think negatively about will come back on this day so that you can either think even more pessimistically or change your way of thinking. In fact you can allow your thoughts to change your entire life if only you willingly choose to stay positive in the face of seemingly negative circumstances. You are a victim to no one when you have an all powerful spirit that resides in your soul.

Saturday – Three of Pentacles


This will be a great day to see the plans you have made begin to manifest. You may find yourself starting a project that will help you gain valuable skills and/or start work with a team of people who will help you get this project off the ground. All in all what you start will definitely set the stage for the rest of the month in great ways.

Weekly Summary

From the beginning you will be guided by a very strong and subtle force that will take you through your trials instead of the easy way around them. Your intuition will be super powered and will give you the proper momentum to deal with your darker shadow issues. You can allow pessimism to ruin your week or instead do the work needed to change those thoughts into a positive mind state.

If you would like to schedule a reading, you can contact me at: OR

Song of the Week —-> Pursuit of Happinesspeace

Brought to you by -The Peace Dealer-

The Cosmic Conundrum Pt. 4 – Heaven & Hell

*Meanwhile in the Underworld*

Scorpio: Okay Gemini. You have to promise me that you will not leak anything I am about to tell you.

Gemini: Just stop now. I will shamelessly tell the world. Even if I didn’t Cancer would sniff it out of me while trying to act like she cares about my day.

Scorpio: ……’s honestly getting much easier to hate you and for that….I appreciate you…..well I don’t care who you tell….we ha-

Gemini: Okay I’m gonna cut you short there. Capricorn tried to cut a deal with me too and my rule is if there are no cookies….then no deal….

Scorpio: Please stop giving me more reasons to kill you……we have to gain insight on what Capricorn is up to. I want you to spy on her.

Gemini: Um yea….last time I tried to do that she had a trained assasin ready to blow my sweet brain to bits….

Scorpio: Don’t worry. With my psychic protection even Cancer won’t be able to detect you.

Gemini: …….and will there be cookies?…..

Scorpio: …………………..

Gemini: …..cuz if not then I’m gonna leave now….

Scorpio: ………..*sigh*……come back with great intel and I will have cookies waiting for you…

Gemini: *devilish grin* I think we have a deal. Peace…*vanishes*

Scorpio: ………I swear…..I will make sure every single last cookie is poisoned…..*facepalm*

*In Heaven*

Sagittarius: Hey Pisces!

Pisces: zzzzzzzzz…….yea what’s up…..

Sagittarius: What’s up with you and Libra…like for real?

Pisces: …..I didn’t wanna tell you while Gemini was around to be honest….Libra…..Libra is afraid to love again.

Sagittarius: Libra is fearless. I don’t see what you mean…

Pisces: Not like in a I am afraid of getting hurt kind of way….it’s almost as if she can’t trust herself. As if she can’t control the force of her heart.

Sagittarius: …….I totally feel where she is coming from…we love hard…and some people can’t handle the force…

Pisces: Well see….I kinda thought we could just be friends…with benefits….and well…

Sagittarius: You both caught feelings for each other?….

Pisces: Oh hell naw….I mean the sex is amazing it’s just…..well….

Sagittarius: …….oh goodness this is worse than I thought…

Pisces: Just promise you won’t tell Gemini!

Sagittarius: I promise….I’ll be back…gotta talk to Virgo….

*To Be Continued*

The Cosmic Conundrum Pt. 3 – Mutable Sign Meeting

Mutable Sign Meeting

Sagittarius: So…..what are we meeting again for?

Virgo: And this….is why I hate you…..

Gemini: I got the most important scoop ever. But we are meeting so that we can discuss…..things…..we will pretend that they mean something…but we all know they ultimately don’t.

Virgo: Um excuse me but you’re not the judge of that….

Sagittarius: Okay….well what things are we gonna discuss?

Virgo: How about we talk about the fact that there is so much injustice in the world and nobody is doing anything about it….except me? Oh wait never mind you ladies don’t even care…none of you really do…

Sagittarius: I care!

Virgo: You flaked on our only opportunity to gain an important lead on who is responsible for this corruption…because you didn’t want to miss that new Kevin Gates concert…

Sagittarius: I DON’T GET TIRED!

Virgo: …….*takes deep breath*……*sigh*

Gemini: Okay guys well I found out important information from the Fixed and Cardinal sign clans. Leo is aware that something is wrong with the transmission of conscious energy between realms and Capricorn is planning is to battle the opposition against her.

Virgo: Please do not mention those royal idiots. They think they can treat us any way they like. They act like we can’t just stop what we are doing for them and take over.

Gemini: We can do that?

Virgo: …….*takes deep breath*……*sigh*

Gemini: Anyway both parties are both suspicious of Pisces. Speaking of which….Pisces tell us what’s the deal with you and Libra.

Pisces: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…………..

Virgo: …….*takes deep breath*……*sigh*

Gemini: Asleep as usual….well we can ask her when she wakes up.

Virgo: You know what…..I have about had it with you incompetent, stupid, idiotic fools… for real….how can I manage with you all…..Gemini you open your mouth as if you are saying the wisest things yet have no idea how much of buffoon you really sound. Sagittarius… are an immature little…….ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW? TURN OFF THAT GODDAMN GAMEBOY!!!

Sagittarius: Wait please! I’m almost done. You don’t understand it took me forever to get close to beating this leve-


Gemini: Okay okay you’re right about humanity and all but…..’buffoon’…….really? Is that the best you could cone up with?

Virgo: …….*takes deep breath*……*sigh*……this isn’t worth it. You’re all just wasting my time. Looks like if you want something done you gotta do it yourself…

*Virgo leaves room*

Gemini: She’ll be back…she always come back.

Sagittarius: Like OMG what is her problem?

Gemini: She does have a point I feel where she’s coming from. Unfortunately I lack the attention span and empathy to really care though. Pisces….wake up!

Pisces: zzzzzzzzzzzz………huh?

Gemini: What’s up with you and Libra?

Pisces: ……….the caterpillar does not need to know the actions of the butterfly….

Gemini: Oh noooo……you’re speaking in ambiguous koans again….please not now….

Sagittarius: Don’t worry I actually speak those *puts down Gameboy* Pisces…does the rabbit jump as far as the coconut?

Pisces: Only if the peanut gallery is watching.

Sagittarius: Wow. So that means Jane Austin really does have a backbone.

Pisces: No. The backbone has Jane Austin..

Sagittarius: When the philosopher spits on it does it get hard?

Pisces: Winter never gets cold when the Sun visits camel toe…

Sagittarius: …oh wow..this situation is more serious than I thought…

Gemini: So am I supposed to sit and act like you two literally said anything of substance right now.

Sagittarius: Don’t worry I’ll translate…basically Pisces is being used by Libra and Capricorn to manipulate the masses using media programming to put them asleep.

Gemini: I know that already I heard them say that in the meeting.

Sagittarius: You didn’t let me finish. At first Libra went along with the plan but now…she’s not sure whether to move forward with it. Her hypnotism over Pisces has psychological affects on her and it’s messing with her.

Gemini: Wait you don’t mean…..

Sagittarius: Yea….Libra is falling in love…for the first time…..with Pisces….

Gemini: ….oh I was talking more about the precautions of imagination getting distorted with an improper use of justice but….I guess that’s important too?

Sagittarius: It’s very important because Libra has to make a decision now……

Gemini: ……awwwwwwwwwwww mannnnnn………….but…..she’s like….SUPER indecisive….like…..

Sagittarius: Yup….basically the greatest stalemate in existence.

Gemini: *sigh*………well what now?

Pisces: You shouldn’t have asked that….but oh well. *Goes back to sleep* Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Sagittarius: Well this meeting is going nowhere….I’m going home…..

*Sagittarius rips open dimensional fabric and walks through the veil*

Gemini: … off…….well anyway I guess that’s that. All that information gathered and for what? Back where I started….

Scorpio: You sure about that?

Gemini: Woah!!! Where-

Scorpio: That’s none of your business…..I need your help. And I don’t like asking anyone for help so don’t make this hard for me.

Gemini: You know me, I’m down for anything. What’s up?

Scorpio: Capricorn is in my way. Her import and export business is messing up things for me.

Gemini: What things?

Scorpio: Again…..that’s none of your business…..I need you to infiltrate and eavesdrop certain people. No one else knew at our meeting but I’m not stupid I knew you were there listening so I respect your skills. I want you to use them for me.

Gemini: Hmmm…….I’ll think about it….


The Cosmic Conundrum Pt. 2 – Cardinal Sign Meeting

It’s the Moment you all have been waiting for….the secret meeting of the Cardinal Signs! The Fixed Signs are like stubborn royalty but the Cardinal Signs are like the Bilderburger groups of the zodiac who monopolize EVERYTHING! So whereas the Fixed Signs have time to leisurely talk about basically nothing important and can meet often, the Cardinal Signs meet only once a year. They look down on the Mutable Sign Clan because we do NOTHING and get credit for EVERYTHING. They really just jealous tho ‪#‎KanyeShrug‬

Either way this imformation is exclusive. I am just a mere messenger so the Divine Council treats me like a replaceable TMZ gossip journalist thus my life is felt as expendable to them. I may realistically get killed as they go at lengths to keep this information secret. Capricorn would most certainly kill me on the spot…….but I’m so close…I gotta see Libra…

*All Four Cardinal Signs take their seats*

Aries: Okay ladies…’s time.

Cancer: *sips tea*

Capricorn: ………


Aries: I’ve been so busy that I never really mentioned this but….while you were all fighting these new tax laws vehemently I revolutionized the concept of global economy using logarithms and statistic principles.

Cancer: …..were you always this brilliant?

Libra: Yea she has. She just acts more than she speaks. She’s actually the only one who can out think Gemini.

Cancer: Speaking of Gemini I guess this is the perfect time to mention that she is right out the door eavesdropping on our entire conversation.

Aries: ……….

Libra: *sips tea*

Capricorn: I’ve had an assasin trained on her the moment she walked in. I’ll send the order to kill her now…

Cancer: Wait…..let her live. You know she’s gonna tell EVERYONE….that may actually work in our favor.

Capricorn: #KanyeShrug

Aries: What a dumbass smh…..okay don’t care anymore. We’re gonna do away with all the sweat shops and cheap labor around the world. Justice for all. We can really make the world right….once and for all.

Libra: Yes sister. You know me. At any moment I can sway the popular opinion around the world. My mastery over politics is forever unparalleled. So whatever laws you need made I can start talking to the judges in the prospective provinces.

Cancer: Your intentions are noble yes. But you do know your opposition is insurmountable right?

Aries: I know no fear.

Cancer: *sips tea*

Aries: Well done Libra I will draft up some initiatives and bills for various nations around the world. Capricorn you inspired this whole plan. Seeing you work with the utmost of integrity was the only reason I was able to piece this all together.

Capricorn: *Poker Face*

Libra: Impeccable job Aries! You are The One. The One who will Change The World.

Aries: Well I have to go to the gym to work out with Sagittarius like I promised. Virgo so kindly typed out written and visual reports of all the details and stats. Catch you all next year!

*Aries leaves room*

Capricorn: *sigh* Poor girl….she is literally blind to corruption and too naive for her own good….anyway here are the real orders. Most of the new leaders being accepted as leaders in these developing countries with budding economies are ruining my imports and exports with their radical new influence. Cheap labor is getting harder to do especially with the Internet educating people.

Libra: A hard challenge indeed. But worry not. Like I said I have political influence. Too many of these people depend on your control system so much they don’t even realize how subconsciously ingrained it is in them.

Cancer: Yea it would take at least the next generation of individuals born in an information age to be immune to our programming.

Capricorn: Sounds great. I’ll be taking my leave now. Libra I will need you to keep our influence on the media strong with Pisces. Pisces is our avenue to putting the masses to sleep. As long as you can keep hypnotizing Pisces with your charm she will never be free from your control. This meeting is adjouned.


*Capricorn leaves room*

Cancer: Libra….before you leave……..spill the beans. Something is wrong. Capricorn is too busy and Aries is oblivious but I feel a deep sadness within you. You can trust me….

Libra: …………….

Cancer: Ever since you have been working with Pisces…’ve been different….you don’t smile anymore….there used to be such warmth in your laugh……but now you are cold as ice…it’s breaking my heart….

Libra ……………

*Libra leaves room*

Cancer: ……….

*tears roll down eyes as she silently leaves*

I’m so lucky Cancer allowed me to live. I used that split second to escape. Just my luck *evil grin* Wow that was intense. The Mutable Sign Meeting is next. I’m almost positive that’s where I can find the answer to EVERYTHING!


The Cosmic Conundrum Pt. 1 – Fixed Sign Meeting


You guys!! I’m currently eaves dropping on a meeting between the Fixed Signs of the Zodiac!! Join me!

Leo: Are we ready to start the meeting?

Scorpio: Hurry up Scandal is gonna come on tonight.

Aquarius: Ew you actually tune into to human television programs? How basic.

Scorpio: Shut up you weird excuse for an alien…

Aquarius: ………….I’m sorry what was that I couldn’t hear you over the sound of your own mediocrity.

Leo: Okay you lovebirds let’s begin the meeti….oh fuck where is Taurus….

Aquarius: Eating

Scorpio: *shakes head*

Leo: Okay anyway there is a huge problem. Nobody is paying attention to me….and we need to do something about it.

Aquarius: Be serious Leo what’s the real issue?

Leo: …….didn’t you just hear what I said?

Scorpio: Aquarius what her royalty is trying to say is that not enough people are paying attention to the conscious rays from the Sun whispering in the hearts of these galactic beings.

Aquarius: I didn’t ask you, you think you understand it all huh?

Scorpio: Um and you think you know it all huh?

*Taurus walks in*

Taurus: *burp* what did I miss?

Leo: We were talking about me what did you expect?

Taurus: Yay my favorite subject *eye roll*

Leo: Listen guys Pisces and Libra are up to something I just know it…

Aquarius: You know…..I think you’re right. Pisces hasn’t been acting normal

Scorpio: When does that motherfucker ever act normal???

Taurus: No Leo is right….I noticed something is wrong with Libra. Have you noticed the injustice rampant on my planet Earth?

Leo: Exactly…well I don’t care about the injustice…they aren’t paying enough attention to me down there.

Aquarius: Leo you are not that self absorbed please drop the act….you actually care about these humans admit it…

Scorpio: Can I leave now? Scandal is about to start…..

Taurus: Aquarius you lied to me you said there was gonna be an orgy not a meeting….

Leo: Guys pay attention!! Justice and imagination are being skewed we have to do something about this.

Aquarius: Just let Virgo take care of it. We always give them all the work to do.

Leo: Great idea but they refused to help anymore because of some insignificant nonsense about not being appreciated enough…

Scorpio: Look my ‘dear friends’ I would give you my advice but you would call it too raw and too deep for it to be effective. So I’m going to go watch my sh-

Taurus: What should be done Scorpio?

Scorpio: *deep stare*……….well if you must know Libra has yet to know love because they do so much they haven’t stopped to smell the roses. Pisces is lonely as hell and no one wants to understand her. They aren’t acting weird, they are trying to fix things their own way. I think we should get off our thrones and show them what they are missing……

Leo: HAHAHAHAHA this bitch said we should get off our thrones!! HAHAHAHAHA

Aquarius: HAHAHA and that we should show them love HAHAHA

Scorpio: …………..

*Scorpio leaves room*

Taurus: Really mature ladies…..

Leo: Oh she was being serious? I’m sorry….*coyly winks at Aquarius* Get it? Cuz I’m really not HAHAHA

Aquarius: Okay well either way we do have a problem on our hand. I’m gonna pretend to care but I really don’t. That leaves you two Leo and Taurus. What’s the deal?

Leo: Well I’m gonna keep providing conscious illumination like I always do *hair flip*

Taurus: ………I think Scorpio was right….I’m gonna get off my throne and help these two……something’s just not right….

Aquarius: Word…meeting adjourned!

Leo: Um we aren’t done yet!

Aquarius: Okay….what’s up?

Leo: …….NOW the meeting is done!

Taurus and Aquarius: *rolls eyes*